Returns

Well, trips a yonder to a mysterious land in the east prevented Sockface to update its blog. For many a week, Sockface ventured through the terrains of an outer system planet called Marmindia VII. It was a strange land of ghost seekers, hunting ethereal demons in the forest. Sockface was fishing along the mountain ranges for an Octopoid Moonswimmer. It appeared one night, floating through the low lying fog. Sockface primed his doomsday device. Five seconds later the planet Marmindia was enveloped by a black hole. Floating in his death-proof bubble, Sockface towed the Octopoid back in a big net. The Moonswimmer has zero mass and so isn't affected by the gravitational pull of a singularity. Sockface flew home and used the Octopoid to detect and free lost souls, trapped between life and death. After setting free to the afterlife the 177 billion souls that died in the Marmindia Doomsday, Sockface saved a number of other trapped spirits. In the end, it was a net gain of 5 souls.

The first was Hilary McBuffon, an elderly lady who had a stroke whilst straining on the toilet. Her decaying corpse was not found for 34 years.

The second and third were monkeys who jumped into a quantum fissure.

The forth trapped soul belonged to Ivan Harzinger, serial paedophile and rapist

The fifth was the ghost that was haunting the house of Sockface. The ghost was called Melvin and liked to watch Saturday morning cookery shows on the telebox. Melvin would then spend the rest of the day watching videotapes of adverts circa 1993.