Magic beans

Glistening in the starlit sky, a magic bean fell from the night. It was late in Quanlibook village and the residents were asleep in their beds, dreaming dreams of faraway places. Sockface was outside talking to the trees and a purple glint falling to the ground caught its eye. It was the magic bean. Sockface hopped to it and peered down with its button eyes. It was a juicy purple bean that glowed, lighting up the soil beneath with a deep hue. Sockface ate the bean.

In a surge of beaniness Sockface grew to a million meters, cackling socky noises. It grew and grew and grew until it was three million meters high. That was when Sockface bumped his head on the moon. The moon rumbled and groaned and shouted at Sockface. "FUCK YOU MAN, I'M TRYING TO SLEEP HERE' the moon wailed. As it awoke, a long rocky, crater encrusted moon tentacle slapped the giant Sockface in the knitwear. Sockface headbutted the moon in the face and made it wobble out of orbit. The sock then shrunk to its previous size. The moon finally settled a hundred thousand miles further out of orbit from earth. It caused a multitude of horrific natural disasters from the gravity shift and many, many people died. Sockface said good night to the trees and went to sleep